I truly got to know my inner self today, thats Tesco value toilet paper for you

I've been told that my grammar is very poor but I don't believe them. Only last week she gave me £20

Jokes about white sugar are rare. Jokes about brown sugar, Demerara

In case anyone is interested, my Mrs nostrils are also singed from an accidental release I once sniffed a lighter to see if the gas was coming out, I also stupidly struck it at the same time. Same result. Potential Darwin award? <laugh> I got my wife to try and mimic a Turkish barber to sort out my...

In case anyone is interested, my Mrs nostrils are also singed from an accidental release

The Spanish Donkey does it again!

I've been stockpiling alcohol for years in preparation for the end of the world. It's safe to say that when the end comes, Armageddon drunk

Sir Bobby wrote: ↑

Tue Jan 15, 2019 9:49 pm

Micky Quim wrote: ↑

Tue Jan 15, 2019 9:47 pm

Used too much I think - I was crying my eyes out too

I gave myself a pounding headache the other day doing the exact same

Im blaming cheap Aldi bleach, it was ridiculously strong

Bodacious Benny wrote: ↑

Tue Jan 15, 2019 9:49 pm

Micky Quim wrote: ↑

Tue Jan 15, 2019 9:47 pm

Used too much I think - I was crying my eyes out too

Wtf were you doing cleaning the shower? I thought you had a wife?

She was licking out my bum hole at the time

lassassinblanc wrote: ↑

Tue Jan 15, 2019 7:19 pm

Kane confirmed to be out for 7 weeks meaning he'll miss our match

That won't matter, we'll still get trounced

krully wrote: ↑

Tue Jan 15, 2019 9:00 pm

Micky Quim wrote: ↑

Tue Jan 15, 2019 8:51 pm

I forgot we were playing! Ive burnt my nostrils bleaching the shower - better than watching us throw away the lead

how??

Used too much I think - I was crying my eyes out too

I forgot we were playing! Ive burnt my nostrils bleaching the shower - better than watching us throw away the lead

overseasTOON wrote: ↑

Tue Jan 15, 2019 8:31 am

Micky Quim wrote: ↑

Tue Jan 15, 2019 7:55 am

Im buying a kitten - not sure Im ready for parenthood.

As kitten and kids get older they end up treating you the same anyway; disdain.

Fantastic! Thanks

Im buying a kitten - not sure Im ready for parenthood.

Couldn't give less of a s***. Win or lose. Completely meaningless. Much more interested in Saturdays game and hopefully a win against Blackburn in a weeks time

Ive bet on us to win, for some reason "Ive got a feeling...."

January is miserable enough without giving up booze

overseasTOON wrote: ↑

Fri Jan 04, 2019 9:48 am

How's dry January going Micky Quim?

I decided to not even try with it this year after previous attempts. I am proud of the 7 days I achieved one year, but Im pretty sure I only made 48hrs last year

Are you bothering OT?

Bodacious Benny wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 03, 2019 9:46 am

First day back at work after Christmas

I was happy to get back to a routine and my lunchtime gym sessions

Bring on the bumming