The funny corner

daib0
Inter-Forum Gamemaster
Inter-Forum Gamemaster
Posts: 937
Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2012 10:12 pm
Location: Spain (Pamplona) - England (Reading, when back home)
Contact:

Re: The funny corner

Post by daib0 » Thu Feb 13, 2020 6:08 pm

THE ITALIAN WEDDING

I was a very happy man. My wonderful Italian girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year. So we decided to get married.
There was only one little thing bothering me. It was her beautiful younger sister, Sofia. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very tight miniskirts, and generally was bra-less.

She would regularly bend down when she was near me. I always got more than a nice view. It had to be deliberate. She never did it around anyone else.

One day she called me and asked me to come over. 'To check my Sister's wedding- invitations' she said.
She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to m e that she had feelings and desires for me. She couldn't overcome them anymore. She told me that she wanted me just once before I got married. She said "Before you commit your life to my sister". Well, I was in total shock, and I couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom" she said, "if you want one last wild fling, just come up and have me".

I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. I stood there for a moment. Then turned and made a bee-line straight to the front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my car.

Lo and behold, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping!
With tears in his eyes, my future father-in-law hugged me. He said, 'My son, we are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family my son.'

And the moral of this story is:
Always keep your condoms in your car!!
A friendly Reading FC fan! He is a moderator here: http://www.extremefootballforum.com/forum

daib0
Inter-Forum Gamemaster
Inter-Forum Gamemaster
Posts: 937
Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2012 10:12 pm
Location: Spain (Pamplona) - England (Reading, when back home)
Contact:

Re: The funny corner

Post by daib0 » Mon Mar 02, 2020 2:06 pm

Keighley police are hunting a woman known as the 'knitting needle Nutter', who has stabbed 16 people in the backside with a knitting needle in the last two days.
Chief inspector Malcolm Ballcock thinks she may be following some sort of pattern...
A friendly Reading FC fan! He is a moderator here: http://www.extremefootballforum.com/forum

daib0
Inter-Forum Gamemaster
Inter-Forum Gamemaster
Posts: 937
Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2012 10:12 pm
Location: Spain (Pamplona) - England (Reading, when back home)
Contact:

Re: The funny corner

Post by daib0 » Wed Mar 04, 2020 1:23 pm

Billy and Mick were walking past the grave yard when Mick says "flippin hell Billy theres a fella here was 152 when he died!"

"What's his name?" asked Billy.

"152 ... Miles From London"
A friendly Reading FC fan! He is a moderator here: http://www.extremefootballforum.com/forum

User avatar
UlversToon
Argentina (Messi)
Argentina (Messi)
Posts: 7712
Joined: Mon Feb 06, 2012 9:52 pm
Location: Cumbria

Re: The funny corner

Post by UlversToon » Fri Mar 06, 2020 9:41 pm

A lorry load of terrapins overturned on the A1 near Newcastle today.... a police spokesman has described it as a “Turtle disaster “.

<run>

Somebodys pinched my sombrero
Veteran Poster
Veteran Poster
Posts: 2272
Joined: Wed Feb 01, 2012 10:08 pm
Location: The former mackem heartland of Peterlee

Re: The funny corner

Post by Somebodys pinched my sombrero » Thu Dec 31, 2020 8:07 pm

N V B K I T H E K L O P F
I N V E N T O R Z S F O F
T H E E F G H J I O L P L
Y Q W O R D S E A R C H
H A S J P O D I E D G W K
Supporting the Toon since 1972.

User avatar
UlversToon
Argentina (Messi)
Argentina (Messi)
Posts: 7712
Joined: Mon Feb 06, 2012 9:52 pm
Location: Cumbria

Re: The funny corner

Post by UlversToon » Fri Jan 01, 2021 10:52 am

Somebodys pinched my sombrero wrote:
Thu Dec 31, 2020 8:07 pm
N V B K I T H E K L O P F
I N V E N T O R Z S F O F
T H E E F G H J I O L P L
Y Q W O R D S E A R C H
H A S J P O D I E D G W K
<laugh>

User avatar
Bodacious Benny
Whiskey Business
Whiskey Business
Posts: 35829
Joined: Sat Feb 04, 2012 11:18 am

Re: The funny corner

Post by Bodacious Benny » Fri Jan 01, 2021 2:16 pm

Somebodys pinched my sombrero wrote:
Thu Dec 31, 2020 8:07 pm
N V B K I T H E K L O P F
I N V E N T O R Z S F O F
T H E E F G H J I O L P L
Y Q W O R D S E A R C H
H A S J P O D I E D G W K
<applause>
I'm the scumbag outlaw. You're the pillar of justice. Neither of us like looking at ourselves in the mirror. Do we have a deal?

daib0
Inter-Forum Gamemaster
Inter-Forum Gamemaster
Posts: 937
Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2012 10:12 pm
Location: Spain (Pamplona) - England (Reading, when back home)
Contact:

Re: The funny corner

Post by daib0 » Fri Jan 01, 2021 2:51 pm

Somebodys pinched my sombrero wrote:
Thu Dec 31, 2020 8:07 pm
N V B K I T H E K L O P F
I N V E N T O R Z S F O F
T H E E F G H J I O L P L
Y Q W O R D S E A R C H
H A S J P O D I E D G W K
<applause>
now I get it....took me a while!
A friendly Reading FC fan! He is a moderator here: http://www.extremefootballforum.com/forum

Somebodys pinched my sombrero
Veteran Poster
Veteran Poster
Posts: 2272
Joined: Wed Feb 01, 2012 10:08 pm
Location: The former mackem heartland of Peterlee

Re: The funny corner

Post by Somebodys pinched my sombrero » Fri Jan 08, 2021 9:15 am

Just went into a shop and said, "Can I pay by card?" The cashier said, "No problem, what card do you have?"
I said, "The six of spades!"
Supporting the Toon since 1972.

Fedor
Chancel New Member
Chancel New Member
Posts: 1
Joined: Sat Aug 21, 2021 9:52 am

Re: The funny corner

Post by Fedor » Sat Aug 21, 2021 9:56 am

Once again I am convinced that it is better to download the modification if you want to play calmly, therefore I chose because the original application is very limited in functionality and does not allow you to fully enjoy your time.

User avatar
Bodacious Benny
Whiskey Business
Whiskey Business
Posts: 35829
Joined: Sat Feb 04, 2012 11:18 am

Re: The funny corner

Post by Bodacious Benny » Sat Aug 21, 2021 4:04 pm

Excellent. I'll be sure to try.
I'm the scumbag outlaw. You're the pillar of justice. Neither of us like looking at ourselves in the mirror. Do we have a deal?

User avatar
gola
ASM's Gucci Headband
Posts: 991
Joined: Thu Jan 14, 2021 9:04 am

Re: The funny corner

Post by gola » Sat Aug 28, 2021 1:16 pm

Lol don't get it fedor

Post Reply