General Election 2017

[PTAO?]

Can't wait for Brexit negotiations now.

[Blue & Maroon]

A night that showed that the leaders of our two biggest parties arent fit to govern us. May humiliated but Corbyn has still ultimately failed.

[skalpel]

Two Tories brought onto the BBC this morning after the result was confirmed, with nothing useful to say or do besides to get the piss blasted out of them by Andrew Neill. Presumably they asked for a f***ing fortune for that TV appearance .

[biggeordiedave]

Two Tories brought onto the BBC this morning after the result was confirmed, with nothing useful to say or do besides to get the piss blasted out of them by Andrew Neill. Presumably they asked for a f***ing fortune for that TV appearance .

I can't believe one of them had the audacity to say that the British people had voted for a Conservative government!

[skalpel]

Two Tories brought onto the BBC this morning after the result was confirmed, with nothing useful to say or do besides to get the piss blasted out of them by Andrew Neill. Presumably they asked for a f***ing fortune for that TV appearance .

I can't believe one of them had the audacity to say that the British people had voted for a Conservative government!

yeah he had the look of somebody who is used to being humoured for talking bollocks, but even on this occasion couldn't help but grin at his own planet-scale hubris.

[daib0]

Can't wait for Brexit negotiations now.

[Ramone]

A night that showed that the leaders of our two biggest parties arent fit to govern us. May humiliated but Corbyn has still ultimately failed.

Almost every single pundit is saying this is a victory for Labour

[TommyToon]

Elections just wouldn't be the same without the weirdos

[tweet][/tweet]

My constituency

[Tsi]

Elections just wouldn't be the same without the weirdos

[tweet][/tweet]

My constituency

Tis but a scratch

[TommyToon]

My constituency

Tis but a scratch

Lord Buckethead had one of the best manifestos I've read (quite long so put it in spoilers so as not to annoy people):

SpoilerShow

MY 2017 MANIFESTO: Strong, not entirely stable, leadership

1. The abolition of the Lords (except me).

2. Full facial coverings to be kept legal, especially bucket-related headgear.

3. No third runway to be built at Heathrow: where we’re going we don’t need runways.

4. Ceefax to be brought back immediately, with The Oracle and other Teletext services to be rolled out by the next Parliament.

5. Regeneration of Nicholson’s Shopping Centre, Maidenhead.

6. Buckethead on Brexit: a referendum should be held about whether there should be a second referendum.

7. Nuclear weapons: A firm public commitment to build the £100bn renewal of the Trident weapons system, followed by an equally firm private commitment not to build it. They’re secret submarines, no one will ever know. It’s a win win.

8. Nationalisation of Adele: in order to maximise the efficient use of UK resources, the time is right for great British assets to be brought into public ownership for the common good. This is to be achieved through capital spending.

9. A moratorium until 2022 on whether Birmingham should be converted into a star base.

10. Legalisation of the hunting of fox-hunters.

11. New voting age limit of 16 to be introduced. New voting age limit of 80 to be introduced too.

12. Katie Hopkins to be banished to the Phantom Zone.

13. Stop selling arms to Saudi Arabia. Start buying lasers from Lord Buckethead.

14. Prospective MPs to live in the seat they wish to represent for at least five years before election, to improve local representation in Parliament.

15. Free bikes for everyone, to help combat obesity, traffic congestion and bike theft.

[skalpel]

A night that showed that the leaders of our two biggest parties arent fit to govern us. May humiliated but Corbyn has still ultimately failed.

Almost every single pundit is saying this is a victory for Labour

Aye but he said he was running to win a majority and become PM, he didn't win a majority and isn't PM, therefore he failed. There are small Labour victories, such as having defied the pundits who said it would be a Tory landslide, making May look an even bigger buffoon, and having brought in the biggest Labour vote share in generations, but that doesn't mean that he hasn't failed to do what he said out to do.

That a Labour government charged with optimism and after a very good campaign still couldn't snap away the bony grip of this f***ing funereal Tory government led by an jittering and vacuous ninny is a really devastating testament to why it matters that you aren't hauling about so much baggage if you want the top jobs in politics. Even the rift within Labour over Corbyn was in no small part because nearly everybody expected him to get so battered in the press for his previous ballsups and convictions (as well as that of his selected coterie) that a vote for him would be beyond the principles of many people who would otherwise consider giving him a go.

[Seagull]

DUP

[Blue & Maroon]

A night that showed that the leaders of our two biggest parties arent fit to govern us. May humiliated but Corbyn has still ultimately failed.

Almost every single pundit is saying this is a victory for Labour

If you think that not winning enough seats to be able to form a government, even in a coaliton is a success despite May running possibly the worst campaign in human history then you are looking at everything wrong. The Tories will still form a government, their share of.the vote actually increased from 2015! He has acheived a minor swing which under normal circumstances wpuld have yielded nothing and I suspect if.he had been up against Cameron he would have been soundly beaten.

[skalpel]

DUP

I guess it gives May room to make her Brexit screwups look like acquiescence to the interests of Northern Ireland and the border .

[Blue & Maroon]

This is a Tory defeat not a Labour victory.

[Tsi]

Tis but a scratch

Lord Buckethead had one of the best manifestos I've read (quite long so put it in spoilers so as not to annoy people):

SpoilerShow

MY 2017 MANIFESTO: Strong, not entirely stable, leadership

1. The abolition of the Lords (except me).

2. Full facial coverings to be kept legal, especially bucket-related headgear.

3. No third runway to be built at Heathrow: where we’re going we don’t need runways.

4. Ceefax to be brought back immediately, with The Oracle and other Teletext services to be rolled out by the next Parliament.

5. Regeneration of Nicholson’s Shopping Centre, Maidenhead.

6. Buckethead on Brexit: a referendum should be held about whether there should be a second referendum.

7. Nuclear weapons: A firm public commitment to build the £100bn renewal of the Trident weapons system, followed by an equally firm private commitment not to build it. They’re secret submarines, no one will ever know. It’s a win win.

8. Nationalisation of Adele: in order to maximise the efficient use of UK resources, the time is right for great British assets to be brought into public ownership for the common good. This is to be achieved through capital spending.

9. A moratorium until 2022 on whether Birmingham should be converted into a star base.

10. Legalisation of the hunting of fox-hunters.

11. New voting age limit of 16 to be introduced. New voting age limit of 80 to be introduced too.

12. Katie Hopkins to be banished to the Phantom Zone.

13. Stop selling arms to Saudi Arabia. Start buying lasers from Lord Buckethead.

14. Prospective MPs to live in the seat they wish to represent for at least five years before election, to improve local representation in Parliament.

15. Free bikes for everyone, to help combat obesity, traffic congestion and bike theft.

[ALF]

Almost every single pundit is saying this is a victory for Labour

If you think that not winning enough seats to be able to form a government, even in a coaliton is a success despite May running possibly the worst campaign in human history then you are looking at everything wrong. The Tories will still form a government, their share of.the vote actually increased from 2015! He has acheived a minor swing which under normal circumstances wpuld have yielded nothing and I suspect if.he had been up against Cameron he would have been soundly beaten.

Rubbish. Corbyn gained 3.5million Labour voters from the last election. The 18-24 turnout was over 70% and heavily in favour of Labour. The Tories don't have a majority and if May was at all sane or respectable she'd resign. The 50-100 majority she was expecting when she called the election has been wiped out. When Corbyn took over he was one of the most unpopular figures in politics, he's completely changed that in under 2 years.

[Blue & Maroon]

He's won a few victories, yes, but he has failed to knock the Tories (whos share also increased) out of government. If youre not aiming for that as the party of opposition then what are you aiming for? Hes done really well but fallen short and if May hadnt been such a pantomime villan she would have won.

[Donkey Toon]

Tis but a scratch

Lord Buckethead had one of the best manifestos I've read (quite long so put it in spoilers so as not to annoy people):

SpoilerShow

MY 2017 MANIFESTO: Strong, not entirely stable, leadership

1. The abolition of the Lords (except me).

2. Full facial coverings to be kept legal, especially bucket-related headgear.

3. No third runway to be built at Heathrow: where we’re going we don’t need runways.

4. Ceefax to be brought back immediately, with The Oracle and other Teletext services to be rolled out by the next Parliament.

5. Regeneration of Nicholson’s Shopping Centre, Maidenhead.

6. Buckethead on Brexit: a referendum should be held about whether there should be a second referendum.

7. Nuclear weapons: A firm public commitment to build the £100bn renewal of the Trident weapons system, followed by an equally firm private commitment not to build it. They’re secret submarines, no one will ever know. It’s a win win.

8. Nationalisation of Adele: in order to maximise the efficient use of UK resources, the time is right for great British assets to be brought into public ownership for the common good. This is to be achieved through capital spending.

9. A moratorium until 2022 on whether Birmingham should be converted into a star base.

10. Legalisation of the hunting of fox-hunters.

11. New voting age limit of 16 to be introduced. New voting age limit of 80 to be introduced too.

12. Katie Hopkins to be banished to the Phantom Zone.

13. Stop selling arms to Saudi Arabia. Start buying lasers from Lord Buckethead.

14. Prospective MPs to live in the seat they wish to represent for at least five years before election, to improve local representation in Parliament.

15. Free bikes for everyone, to help combat obesity, traffic congestion and bike theft.

Sensible policies for a modern Britain. I'd have voted for him. Especially approve of the bringing back of Ceefax and nationalisation of Adele.

[bodacious benny]

Number 15 would probably work, you don't see many fat people in Amsterdam.