Our first goal in over six hours came in the most inspiring of fashions: a hoof from Krul nodded down by de Jong for Shola to tuck away, but again a former transfer target would ensure that we continued the streak of losses, as Bony scored in added time at the end of both halves. The goalscorer and Debuchy, who came on after 20 minutes for Cissé, who had started on the wing but was injured thanks to what would later be identified as a broken knee-cap which will keep him of the start of next season, shared the honours of man of the match, while de Jong yet again earned mug of the match. It was another dire performance on the whole, the team averaging a 4.77, while Pardew continued to break records, this time getting a 1.39.
[tfi]140419[/tfi]
(You can click on player names to go to their pages)
Krul - 5.64 Ratings ranged between 5 and 6.5"Played well. Couldn't be blamed for either goal."
"A couple of great stops to keep us in the game and beat Bony to the ball on what could have been a scoring chance."
"Kicking was awful but otherwise not much he could do."
Anita - 5.50 Ratings ranged between 4 and 7
"More or less anonymous until the second half, a bit of nice passing and a decent shot."
"Clearly not a right back. Far better after moving in to midfield & seemed to be running all over."
"Not a RB, yet played at RB. Shocking management. Thankfully Debuchy came on so he got pushed further forward where he was one of our better players."
Williamson - 4.82 Ratings ranged between 4 and 6
"Some nice blocking, and a good effort to make a shot, but not cut out for the PL, as we've said before."
"Decent blocks but lost too many headers and battles with Bony."
"Fairly decent apart from losing Bony for the goal, he is great in the air but Willo was probably beaten too easily."
Coloccini - 4.45 Ratings ranged between 3 and 6.5
"His reading of game saved us from a few counter attacks."
"Couple of mistakes, couple of good things, average."
"Better than previous games, but still not back to his best."
Dummett - 4.68 Ratings ranged between 4 and 7
"Can't cross. Why is that out of all our academy players he gets most chances?"
"'Uncomplicated' in that he has no technical skill and just hoofs the ball up the pitch."
"I don't know if he was under instructions not to cross the halfway line but didn't get forward anywhere near enough."
Gosling - 5.64 Ratings ranged between 4 and 7
"Not bad. Lively attacking but needs a bit of polish on the finer aspects of his game."
"Generally did the right thing and makes lots of runs, just lacks a touch of quality."
" Another decent performance without doing anything special."
Tioté - 3.68 Ratings ranged between 2 and 6
"His fault we lost. He was terrible all match, he gave the ball away too many times."
"Don't even think the pen was completely his fault, but definitely f*cked us."
"A bit hit and miss. More so miss though like the rest of the team."
Cissé - N/A
"Injured early on. Was being played on the RW though which is shocking management."
De Jong - 3.00 Ratings ranged between 1 and 5
"Good assist, but wasn't great apart from that."
"Set the goal up so will give him that. Needs to improve and fast."
"I slated him seconds before he scored much to the amusement of those who sit next to me. Took his goal well, won a lot of headers, still too slow for this level."
Gouffran - 3.55 Ratings ranged between 1 and 5
"Plays football and yet somehow doesn't influence the game."
"Played better when Debuchy came on, good header but needs to step it up."
"His decline has been embarrassing. Contributes little, far too weak on the ball. Should be dropped."
Shola - 6.00 (MOTM) Ratings ranged between 3.5 and 7
"Probably our best player, says it all. Tidy goal."
"Got the goal, pestered the Swansea defence until he got tired."
"I know he scored, but apart from that he contributed nothing, why do we bother with him?"
Debuchy - 6.00 (MOTM) Ratings ranged between 5 and 7
"Made us look a better team."
"Got forward and knew which way the goal is which is an improvement."
"Should have started. Clearly match fit, one of our better players. As I say though I haven't seen the first goal. "
Rémy - 4.23 Ratings ranged between 2 and 5.5
"Wasteful, probably not ready to be playing yet."
"Poor, but he didn't look match fit."
"Shouldn't have been on the bench never mind came on. He's clearly still injured or at the very least severely unfit. Not match fit, shocking management. "
Armstrong - N/A
"Looked set for a 6ish performance, did a couple of good things."
"Looks better than Campbell imo. Has a bit about him. Looks like a dwarf."
"Played at CM. Shocking management. Pardew bangs on about not wanting to ruin youngsters yet he always does it. He's a f*cking striker man Alan you c*nt. He should be given a decent run out up front. Not 10mins or so at CM. Did the same with Campbell constantly playing him on the LW rather than up front. "
Pardew - 1.39 Ratings ranged between 1 and 3
"Forced into the changes that he did make, put out a stupid starting lineup."
"Not even bothering to talk about it. Stupid lineup forced into a slightly better one by injury and we still got outplayed massively. F*ck off."
"He has to go, please please go. I can honestly say I have never ever watched a newcastle team play such negative football. Does he have any idea of what it means to be Newcastle United. Wrong tactics, wrong team, rubbish manager."
"F*cking atrocious management. Far too many players out of position. Stupid formations and player selections. The guy has lost the plot. Pathetic excuses again. Saying he would have stopped the pen if he was on the touchline. What were you going to do Alan? Stick the nut on him before he got into the box. The guy is a colossal c*nt and he's killing our club. Pardew Out."
"Everyone has said what needs to be said about this utter tw*t. The team selection, the tactics, the subs - the 'I would have prevented their second goal' bollocks. PARDEW OUT."
